Sly says his new move, "Rambo," truly shows the horrors of war. We doubt that it ranks up there with "The Pianist," but then again, Adrien Brody couldn't beat up our Mother. You get what you deserve Myanmar, but it will...

We've got 'em all folks: Sly Stallone pimping "Rambo," Bruce Willis going back to his Bruno days and Ah-Nald apparently seeking budgetary advice from both of them. The funny thing about Sly (minus the HGH) is that "Rocky...

Oh, but not your baby. He's adorable. Especially that picture from the beach where he's got the floaties around his neck and arms. What's that? You don't own any floaties? Huh. At least he's healthy.

If your only familiarity with bears is Yogi, Smokey and the Berenstain family, well, you've a lot to learn about "Bears" and the "Cubs" who love them. Kevin Smith (best known as "Silent Bob") asks, "There's someone out there...

We can rebuild him...and then rebuild him again, if necessary. With a body like that though, we can't imagine the world could handle a bionic Chris Elliott. It's just not fair, some guys have it all: looks, brains, robot arms...

Well, for O.J. jokes, anyhow. When the "funny ha-ha" machine breaks and Dave can't deliver the "Top 10 O.J. Simpson Execuses," he breaks out the toolbelt. He proves once and for all that he's just as handy with a socket...

Letterman gives Kat Von D from "L.A. Ink" a thorough examination, making sure her tats are all in order. Nice try Dave, you old horn dog. For further proof, see how much Letterman enjoys Martha Stewart's "hairy balls." Don't...

...as presented by the "Bad Santa" himself. We aren't surprised that it's tough being the most famous guy named "Billy Bob," but we were taken aback that he traded his Oscar for a chimp named Marty.

Dr. Phil stops by the "Late Show" to weigh in on the Britney Spears VMA meltdown, but the conversation quickly turns to Dave's obsession with pictures of her exposed pudenda. Dave also becomes enamored of the word "panties,"...

Clinton doesn't get points for originality (and the less said about that tired "pulling over and asking for directions" gag the better), but turning Gitmo into a DQ would be a delicious start to a new presidency.

If you've been asking yourself, "why, after six years, haven't we been able to find a 6-foot-5 bearded Arab with a dialysis machine?" It's because he's hiding out next door. The summer-ending "sun, fun and jihad" party should...

Talk show hosts rarely get the chance to the discuss difficulties inherent to the gig with peers. Here, Letterman and DeGeneres talk about the tough stuff, like when actors don't have much to say and when it's the right time...

Get your mind out of the gutter and check out the lung power on this vintage episode of Stupid Human Tricks. This amazing young woman can suck and blow at the same time. Now we're back in the gutter again!

The Bush Administration is keeping it together about as well the mortgage-lending industry. The latest defector is Attorney General Alberto Gonzales. We figured it's because he's mired (and Harriet-Miered) in the muck of his...

Judd Apatow, the director of "Knocked Up" and the "40-Year-Old Virgin," stops by the "Late Show" to regale Dave with tales about his former roommate Adam Sandler and their hijinx. It turns out Happy Gilmore had an unhealthy...